Saturday, February 28, 2009 @ 2:16 AM
LOSING HOPE BUT STAYING STRONG .
just waiting for th right time to come .
i can wish for anything but god decides it .
each day , i hope things would get betta than th day before .
nothing seems right .
i can wait but for how long ?
oh god , make my wish come true .
nobody knows what's inside my heart .
just too much questions are in my mind .
currently , i just feel like giving up .
i've been cracking my brain to think bout what i've done wrong that actually hurt pple .
maybe im bad or even worse , maybe im evil .
but inside my heart , i knew i have to stay strong .
i've to face all these challenges .
i dont wish to be haunt by th past .
i dont wish to get all stucked .
i just wanna live my life like i've always do .
but something is stopping me .
what is it , i dont know .
when i look in th mirror , i'll laugh , thinking of how foolish i am .
whenever i feel kinda down , i try to bring myself up .
sometimes im pretending to be happy but actually im nort .
im just trying real hard to smile .
i tried to go on with life without thinking bout th past .
but then , you came back & bring me down once again .
i dont deserve all this , i simply dont .
thorns are poking thru my heart .
how painful it is , only i know .
actually , we dont have to do it this way .
i wanna solve it in a nicer way but you dont want .
& you're saying i dont care .
who doesnt care ? me or you ?
well , its all proven now .
no matter how hard i try to be frends with you , it wont work .
you have your own way of thinking & i have mine .
we just wont be able to understand one another .
or maybe its you who just dont understand me .
what i've done for you , you never did appreciate .
say that you've been truthful to me for at least once , oh pleasee dont .
i know you cant fight me back , my frend .
i dont wish to argue with you but i just want to clear things up .
dont go around making up stories bout me .
dont tell lies , for goodness sake la eyh .
i can give you a bad name but i choose nort to .
i dont want to create any scene .
let me live my life & i'll let you live yours .
just another bad day of mine .
my heart is in pain but i just cant let out what's in my heart .
only in this blog is where i express my feelings .
love , friendship , hate , joy , happiness , sadness , fun , boring & stuffs .
i cant do much bout it .
whatever is going to happen , im prepared to accept it .
but im scared .
will i go thru another bad dream ?
or will it be a sweet dream this time round ?
i guess i'll just have to pray hard .
all th memories are still fresh in my mind .
i cant do anything but to treasure it .
it was nice knowing all of you though its only for a short period of time .
each one of you have brought something in my life .
be it good or bad , i really appreciate it .
now , its too late .
those times have gone by .
no point regretting .
instead , we should be thankful for every bit of it .
my heart is in pain .
i dont know what's going to happen next .
but for all i know , i can be a bad or a good thing .
with each effort i try to make things betta , it just hurts .
pichares of those memories just kept playing my mind like a song playing on th radio .
it just kept on repeating .
now , i get th clear pichare .
maybe it was all just a game .
i know i have to go on & try to be happy as much as i can .
i cant let all this stop me from doing what i wanna do .
its my life & i can do what i want .
i've never stop you so you cant stop me .
we're nort even frends , i guess .
so , you shouldnt be interfering in my life .
i know myself well .
i dont pick up fights with pple unless they do something wrong .
for me , i dont wish to have any enemies cause i know that it brings me to nowhere .
but if you force me to then i have no choice .
when i love someone , be it a frend or whatsoever , i appreciate what they do for me , be it small things .
but if i dont like someone , i wont bother what they wanna do .
they can create stories bout me & they can make stupid lies bout me but it wont bring them far .
im nort that type of person who get so stressed up bout all these lies .
in fact , i dont even give a damn bout it .
judge me all you want cause for all i know , im just going to prove you wrong .
true love & friendship last .
but if its puppy love & some pathetic friendship , it wont last long .
